From Pine View Farm

C’est Rire category archive

Textual Analysis 0

Rat:  I was at a red light on the way over here and the guy behind me was honking like crazy because I didn't accelerate fast enough when the light turned green.  Goat:  Don't you hate people like that?  People are just so impatient now.  Rat:  Yeah, I mean, can't a guy text in peace anymore?  Goat:  You failed to mention that.  Rat:  Took six minutes to find the right emoji.

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Hat Tricked 0

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Snow Daze 0

I once had a training class with out-of-town trainees staying in a nearby hotel; one of them told me this story at lunch.

It had snowed heavily over night, though nothing like what we got last week, maybe five or six inches, so the highway department had been able to keep the roads passable. This trainee was deputized to drive the carpool of the rest of the visitors from the hotel to the training site, since, being from Chicago, he “would know how to drive in the snow.”

He’s driving carefully along when one of his passengers asks, “Why are you going so slow?”

He replied, trying not to let his exasperation show, “Because that’s how you drive in the snow.”

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It’s Amazonian! 0

Michelle Robertson investigates the strange case of the gargantuan gift boxes.

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Cheese It! The Cops! 0

Content moved below the fold because it was making the front page weird. It’s just too cute for words. Also, it worked when I previewed it.

If the video doesn’t appear, follow the link at the bottom of the page.

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Bee Sting 0

It’s a honey of a tale. A nugget:

A Montana beekeeper has recovered hives that were stolen from him in California, thanks to an agricultural sting operation.

Lloyd Cunniff of Choteau reported 488 hives stolen in January, after he had transported them to California for the almond pollination season.

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And Now for Something Completely Different 0

Afterthought:

The hold music from my hosting provider, which I seldom had to listen to for more than three or four minutes, included “Down by the Riverside.”

When I heard it, all I could think of was

When you go to the delicatessen store,
don’t buy the liverwurst!

Speaking of liverwurst, one of my favorite sandwiches is liverwurst with onions and mustard on a kaiser roll. I used to get them at my local Wawa in Delaware.

You can’t get one at Wawa in these parts. As a native Virginian, I am disappointed that Virginians don’t seem to understand sandwiches.

Nevertheless, I do know where to get a proper cheesesteak.

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You Get What You Vote For* (subtitles) 0

Spain’s comedian, yclept** “Giggles,” on Brexit:

Via The Local.

___________________

*Remember that come November, dammit.

**Hehe. I used “yclept” in a blog post.

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Call of the Dialed 0

Rat and Goat on couch when phone rings.  Goat says,

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Some Swinging Music 0

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Star Wars: TNG 0

The Millenial Falcon.  Spaceship with crew chatting,


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Phoning It In 0

Robin Root explains the dial phone to her nephew.

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Word Salad 0

Oh, my. Scrabble gets pwned.

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Loyalty Oaths 0

Out Roanoke way, a long-time Republican is fed up after trying to vote in a “firehouse primary” (whatever that is–sounds sort of like a caucus).

I’ll quote a bit of his article, but, really, you should read it.

Along with the usual questions — name, address, phone number, etc. — were questions to which I was required to answer in the affirmative, two of which immediately caught my eye.

One asked if I was in support of the “principles of the Republican Party” and the second required that I affirm that I would support/vote for whomever the Republicans had nominated to run in the November election.

Believing for a split second that Vladimir Putin would suddenly appear and congratulate me for showing up to ensure that he would receive the usual 96.7 percent of the vote, I was incredulous.

When I responded that I had no idea what the “principles of the Republican Party” were . . . (read the rest–ed).

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And Now for Something Completely Different 0

Think twice about the Disney Princess Industrial Complex.

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Beaver Power 0

AKA, revenge of the rodents.

A tree felled by a beaver was cited as the cause of a power outage that impacted about 2,900 Aroostook County customers of Emera Maine Monday night.

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Meet “The Insufferables” 0

Disputes break out among Jeff the Cyclist, Freddy the Fruitarian, Victor the Vegan, and Ernest the Electric Vehicle Driver at the Conference for the Self-Righteous


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I swear I saw Jeff pedaling frantically along this morning.

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Soup or Sausage? 0

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And Now for Something Completely Different 0

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Not Dean’s List Material 0

Then, again, that may depend on which list.

Better luck next time, Dean.

When a student by that name at a Radnor Township university ordered fake IDs from China, his first mistake was having the cards delivered to campus, police say.

The second was not realizing that he shared a name with a ranking school administrator.

Hijinks ensue.

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