Gunnuttery category archive

He was in the drive-thru lane.

He should have played with his food.

Instead, he chose to play with his portable phallus.

Guns and stupid, guns and stupid.
They go together like love and Cupid.
Let me tell you brother,
You can’t have one without the other.

They found politeness in a parking lot.*

_______________–

WIth apologies to Meatloaf.

Yet another “responsible gun owner” exposes a toddler to his portable phallus.

River Willis, who had been sent upstairs with a cellphone to take a nap, came downstairs and said the phone had died. He asked his father to lie with him until he fell asleep, according to the arrest warrant.

Willis said he told him to go to the master bedroom and wait for him — but a few minutes later, he heard the gunshot. He said he ran upstairs to find his son had taken the pistol out of the fanny pack and shot himself in the face.

One more time, “responsible gun owner” is an oxymoron.

And I won’t even get started on what I think sending a two year old off to nap with a cellphone says about our society’s devolution . . . .

The hunt for politeness continues.

Guns and stupid, guns and stupid.
They go together like love and Cupid.
Let me tell you brother,
You can’t have one without the other.

Another “responsible gun owner” allows a child access to a portable phallus . . .

A 6-year-old boy died Tuesday following an accidental shooting at a Montgomery County residence, according to police.

. . . and another news report fails to twig to the difference between “accidental” and “negligent.”.

It appears that politeness is not longer just going to for the dogs.

Now it’s also going to for the cats.

We are a broken society.

Guns and whiskey, guns and whiskey.
Don’t mix them together when you’re feeling frisky,
Because if you do, my brother,
You’ll let yourself in for a spot of bother.

One more time, “responsible gun owner” is an oxymoron.

Once again, politeness goes to for the dogs.

Once again, politeness becomes child’s play.

Yet another “responsible gun owner” performs a random act of politeness.

The investigation quickly led police to the room next door. Investigators say 31-year-old Shermarcus Cockran had just returned from a gun range and was cleaning his firearm in Room 225 when it went off. The bullet traveled through the shared wall, striking the teenager while he was playing video games.

One more time, “responsible gun owner” is an oxymoron.

Aside:

I have long thought that, in gun nut world, “cleaning” is a synonym for “fondling.”

I have cleaned guns. It’s something to do in a workshop or a garage or, failing that, a kitchen, not in a motel room.

Yet another oxymoronic “responsible gun owner” appears to have exposed a portable phallus to a child.

A child was hurt when a gun accidentally discharged in a classroom at Freetown Elementary School in Baltimore, the Anne Arundel County Police Department confirmed Wednesday.

A second-grade student, who had the weapon, suffered a hand injury during the incident.

So many guns. So much stupid.

Yet another oxymoronic “responsible gun owner” discharges his responsibility.

Once again, we are reminded that “accidental” and “negligent” are not synonyms, despite how we might see them used in news reports and police statements.

If you think the elementary school basketball coach should give your little boy more playing time, be sure to make the request with politeness.

We are a society of stupid.

He was backing recklessly out of his driveway.

She was driving her child to school and tapped her horn in warning.

He responded by discharging his phallus of politeness.

Now her child is in the hospital recovering from surgery.

We are a broken society.

He failed to get a grip on his politeness.

One more time, “responsible gun owner” is an oxymoron.

More courtesy on the concrete, more politeness on the pavement.

Yet another “responsible gun owner” feels compelled to expose a portable phallus to a fellow driver.

We are again reminded that a polite society is a clean society.

Guns and stupid, guns and stupid.
They go together like love and Cupid.
Let me tell you brother,
You can’t have one without the other.