2006 archive

“What did you do on your vacation?”

“I got my truck fixed, I got my lawn mower fixed, I got my hot water heater fixed. I should have stayed at work.”

Update: “Oh, yeah, let’s not forget the emergency root canal.”

Percoset rocks.

They need a guard cat:

“I came around the corner and into the kitchen and instead of seeing two cats on the counter, I saw a big, brown bear, a third of the way coming in through the kitchen window,” Yates said. “My instincts kicked in and I raised my hands and yelled, ‘Get out! Get out!’ And lucky for me, it did.”

Oh, my.

Serving on the jury in an indecent-exposure trial unfolding in this conservative Oklahoma town has been a giggle-inducing experience.

Former Judge Donald D. Thompson, a veteran of 23 years on the bench, is on trial on charges he used a penis pump on himself in the courtroom while sitting in judgment of others.

Update, 6/30/2006

Something fishy this way comes:

Marshall and Lyon county grand juries on Tuesday indicted Dwayne E. Nesmith, 43, of Island, and Brian K. Thomas, 31, of Dawson Springs on nine counts of theft by deception of over $300 in Marshall County, one count of complicity to commit theft by deception of over $300 and one count of attempted theft by deception of over $300 in Lyon County.

An investigation of the pair started April 30, when the men allegedly stashed five live bass in a fish basket in the water, then picked them up to weigh in at the Relay for Life Buddy Bass Tournament at the Lake Barkley State Resort Park, state police said.

A conversation over at Opie’s place led me to look this up:

Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall stand
A mighty woman with a torch, whose flame
Is the imprisoned lightning, and her name Mother of Exiles.
From her beacon-hand
Glows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes command
The air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame.
“”Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!”” cries she
With silent lips. “Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!”

Ahh, the lamp is lowered, the light is dim’d, the welcome gone.

And the hope of the world—

oh, never mind.

Two and a half more inches in my rain gauge overnight, making a total of seven inches since Friday. Rivers cresting today. (Update, 6/30/2006: Here’s the actual crest times and heights.)

Brandywine Creek crested at about 2 p. m.. I took some pictures from Brandywine Park in Wilmington between 2:30 and 3:00 p. m.

Looking upstream towards the Washington Street bridge. The trees to the left center marks the normal bank.

Looking downstream towards the Market Street (US 13 business) bridge.

Well over the banks.

There! by the tree! See them? Picnic tables. And to the right, the “No Swimming” sign.

Oh, yeah, that’s the grill that goes with the picnic tables.

This little dam ain’t doin’ a damn thing any more.

No jogging on that trail today:

Looking upstream from the “Swinging Bridge” (it doesn’t swing anymore, but, at one time, it was a rope suspension bridge which struck fear into the hearts of children throughout Wilmington).

Looking downstream from the “Swinging Bridge” to the Washington Street Bridge:

With good reason, today. In minutes you’d end up in the Christina.

Limbaugh’s on again.

Bob Cesca asks the question:

Rush is one of the most visible representatives of the right-wing’s moral values platform — the same values that include abstinence and strong words about the immorality of premarital sex. (Wait for it.) Intercourse and marriage are supposed to be all about procreation, right? I mean, that’s one of the reasons why Republicans like Rush and Sen. Santorum support an amendment banning same-sex marriage.

So if Rush isn’t married, why would he need Viagra?

Nah. It couldn’t be. It’s just not possible that . . .

. . . he’s bloviating hypocrite who thinks he’s above the rules he proscribes for others?

Surely not.

“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said in a rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean–neither more nor less.

“The question is,” said Alice, “whether you can make words mean different things.”

“The question is,” said Humpty Dumpty, “which is to be master–that’s all.”

Humpty Dumpty lives.

Four inches in the last 36 hours, leading to this and this and this, among other things.

Spotted yesterday heading down the Delaware, one tug in front and one amidships on each side. As best as I can figure, it’s the Ammunition Ship Butte.

It’s looks as if it’s going to the last home port.

From the Quotemaster.

Mario Cuomo:

We must get the American public to look past the glitter,
beyond the showmanship, to the reality, the hard substance of
things. And we’ll do it not so much with speeches that will
bring people to their feet as with speeches that bring people
to their senses.

Well, the American public won’t find this at Faux News, that’s for sure.

More on the Enronization of the current Federal Administration:

Former Bush administration procurement official David Safavian has written an email to family and friends saying he plans an appeal (likely to last through July, 2007) and describing himself as “angry, scared, disappointed and hurt,” according to today’s edition of Roll Call.

Scared and disappointed.

Yeah.

He got caught.

Another Bushie learns he’s not above the law.

His signing statement didn’t take.

And he is just a small fry.

Again.

The Iraqi government declared a state of emergency and imposed a curfew Friday after insurgent gunmen set up roadblocks in central Baghdad and opened fire on U.S. and Iraqi troops just north of the heavily fortified Green Zone.

The court decided they wouldn’t stand for this.

As Dave Barry would say, I’m not making this up.

Check out my friend Opie’s story about it.

A child-welfare worker was clocked at 142 miles an hour on his motorcycle while leading police on a two-state chase, authorities said Thursday.

Opera 9 has been released.

Here’s a screenshot showing two of the new Opera widgets–the Opera clock and the “Touched by the Sky” weather widget.

I missed this, but Phillybits caught it:

Pointing out that North Korea test firing a missile would end a moratorium in place since 1999 means absoltely nothing. Zilch. Nada. Zero.

Why?

Because. The US is about to welch on agreements against landmines.

But, then, we all know that whatever the current Federal Administration does is always right, just because they are doing it, now, don’t we? Because they are always right and never wrong.

Just look at their track record.