Too Stupid for Words category archive

This Christmas light display turned into a real hit.

Beckwith said the women attacked her Sunday night over a bad parking job on Lakeview Avenue.

The mother took her 5-month-old twins and 9-year-old to look at the lights when she was confronted by the angry pair.

“I said, ‘You need to settle down. I have kids with me. Let me move my car. It’s no big deal,'” she described.

The next thing Beckwith knew, her head was being slammed against a car, she was punched in the face and her hair was being pulled.

A public relations twit.

Have you heard about the newest thing in iCrap?

Oh, my.

Police were called last night to a South Carolina residence to break up a fight between relatives who pushed and yelled at each other over the decorating of the family’s Christmas tree.

According to a sheriff’s report, the fight began around 10:30 PM and involved three women who live together at the Spartanburg home. The dispute between the women–aged, 76, 61, and 24–was triggered “due to the Christmas tree being decorated by 2 of the females while the other female was at work.”

Hippocritical oath.

They’ve got it.

Authorities say a police officer suffered a broken wrist as he broke up a brawl between two men waiting in line for Black Friday shopping deals at a Southern California Walmart store.

But wait! There’s more!

Bruce Maiman tries to understand why persons subject themselves to shopping on the Friday after Thanksgiving and finds, as Ecclesiastes teaches us, that it’s all illusion.

A nugget:

Another study found that camping out, standing in line the night before, induces a sense of loyalty that researchers call a “collective consumption ritual.” While most of us find waiting in line torturous, these people like it. They even look forward to it. One researcher said, “For the person who’s been doing this for decades, this is as much of their Thanksgiving tradition as having turkey.”

There ya go: The orgy of greed vs. the serenity of family*!

It probably doesn’t pay to tell these people that the best deals don’t even happen on Black Friday. The Wall Street Journal found that nearly one-third of last year’s Black Friday bargains being advertised had been available previously at lower prices.

But as one analyst explained, “People associate Black Friday with good prices, and that eliminates the need to check price.”

________________

*Methinks that dependeth on the family.

The internet is a public pool, and the FBI wants to go fishing in it:

A daybreak, guns-drawn FBI raid on the wrong house has spurred a lawsuit in which the bureau’s legal laser sights are now focused on the occupants’ Facebook and Twitter accounts.

Details at the link. Here’s the thumbnail:

The Feds raided a wrong house, looking for someone who had moved out two years before, frightening and humiliating the current residents. (The FBI, it would seem, is incapable of determining who lives where when. Maybe they need to talk with the NSA. Or possibly public records.)

The residents have now sued.

Now the FBI, as might any bureaucracy, is looking for some way out from under, natch, by smearing the victims.

Relax.

It’s only ones and zeroes.

Reminder: Once the stupid is on the internet, it stays on the internet.

Spongy twits.

Heaven forbid I should ever live in a place like this.

A Florida man who lives in a 55-and-over gated community called cops last week after his two cars were spray painted with the words “No Kids,” apparent neighborly retribution for his four-year-old granddaughter occasionally staying at his residence.

This is what happens when you don’t think about what words mean.

I hope I never want a doughnut this bad.

(And, if I did, it sure wouldn’t be a Dunkin’. It would be a Krispie Kreme.)

Marketing twits.

Stalking twits.

The internet is a pub(l)ic place.

Warning: Language and extreme male idiocy.