Words Fail Me category archive

The other day I went to the doctor for a routine checkup.

As I got on the scale, the nurse, who looked late-twentyish-early-thirtyish, said something like, “You’re awfully spry for such an old geezer.” (Not her exact words, but you catch my meaning, you get my drift.)

I said,

Yes, but I have this picture in my attic . . . .

She had no idea to what I alluded.

In the San Jose Mercury-News, Scott Herhold rounds up nominees for his NIMBY awards. A nugget:

For several years now, the folks in San Jose’s Hanchett Park neighborhood have dreamed of replacing a Pizza Hut restaurant at Race and Park streets with a pocket park. They’ve even drawn up schematics for a bit of greenery that would need city funding. San Jose Councilman Pierluigi Oliverio tells an intriguing story about the reaction of a few other neighbors. “Will there be children in the park?” they asked. When told yes, they said, “Well, maybe a park isn’t such a good idea.”

From the “If I Told You I’d Have To Kill You” Dept.

In a letter (PDF) recently sent to Senators Ron Wyden (D-OR) and Mark Udall (D-CO), the National Security Agency’s (NSA) Inspector General explains that he cannot provide an estimate of how many Americans the agency has spied on, because doing so would “would itself violate the privacy of U.S. persons.”

Nonestly, you can’t make this stuff up.

More fancy footwork at the link.

I had been under the comfortable delusion that Chia Pets had gone the way of Pet Rocks until my friend brought home her birthday present.

It comes in two flavors: “Determined” and “Happy.”

Read more »

This is really too stupid for words.

But not at all surprising, given Republicans’ pervy preoccupation with sex.

The defendant testifies in the Philadelphia should-have-been-a-RICO trial.

Honestly, you can’t make this stuff up.

Twitting is beyond him:

But (Philadelphia City–ed.) Councilman Jim Kenney apparently needs help. Professional help.

The at-large councilman is spending $28,800 in taxpayer money this fiscal year for the Center City-based company ChatterBlast to perfect his “social-media strategy.” The company monitors his Twitter and Facebook pages, and has posted on Kenney’s campaign-funded website.

No other Council member pays a contractor to help with Twitter. Just Kenney, who has the third-priciest staff on Council. He has 10 staff members with a payroll of $654,034, including his salary – plus another outside communications consultant.

A Republican have apparently decided that the Girl Scouts have gone over the edge into radicalism, based on “a small amount of web research.”

Really, what is there to add?

If you need more evidence that the Party of Privilege has no idea what life is like for the peons . . . .

Sen. Scott Brown (R-MA) made the case in Lowell, MA on Friday that letting the Bush tax cuts for the wealthy expire would create a burden for well-off teachers, firefighters, and police officers.

Follow the link for the direct quote.

I met someone recently who thought “Santorum” actually means what Teh Google says it means (no, I’m not putting that definition here; Google it if you must).

Really and truly.

We explained the concept of “Google Bomb.”

So much for Twitter as a conduit of information (Warning: Language.)

Via BlagHag, who concludes that there is no hope for humanity.

Honestly, you couldn’t make this stuff up.

SeattlePI dot com reports:

Thrice-married Republican presidential frontrunner Newt Gingrich has promised fidelity in his current marriage in a letter to a conservative, anti-abortion group in Iowa.

er, yeah.

This has been nagging at me for several days now.

Wednesday, Edward Wasserman wasted precious electrons at Philly dot com wondering whether charges that Herman Cain committed long-term adultery should matter as regards his apparently defunct campaign for the Republican presidential nomination.

Wasserman did not mention the several charges–charges made credible by settlements paid by his employer–of Cain’s using or attempting to use his privilege, position, and power to extort sexual favors from persons subordinate to him.

Furrfu.

Offered without comment:

A new legal regulation has come into force in Hungary making homelessness punishable by a fine of around $600 (£384) or prison.

MPs from the ruling conservative party proposed the regulation, on the grounds that Budapest could not cope with the large number of people on the streets.

Also under consideration for inclusion in the Catholic Missal.

Addendum:

The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette discusses the Old Boys Club:

It is sickeningly familiar, these allegations that a previously respected member of the community committed unspeakable acts against boys, and that other men in positions of power looked the other way.

Oh, my.

A woman who won €32,000 ($44,500) on a German quiz show has been fired from her part-time job by her boss who said she no longer needed money, the Bild newspaper reported on Wednesday.

Friedhild Miller, 42, won the money on the German version of “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire” on Monday. On Tuesday, a few hours before she was due to show up for work as a secretary in a car transport firm, she was sacked by her employer, named only as Salvador S., with a text message saying “you don’t really need money at the moment and I’ve got none to give away.”

Omerta in action:

Msgr. William J. Lynn, the former church official awaiting trial for allegedly protecting sexually abusive priests, drew words of encouragement from Philadelphia’s new archbishop and a standing ovation from scores of priests at a private gathering last month, according to people familiar with the event.

During the invitation-only dinner for Archbishop Charles J. Chaput at a parish hall in Montgomery County, Chaput singled out Lynn in the crowd and noted how difficult the ordeal has been for him, according to one priest who attended and two people briefed by others at the gala.

Much of the audience, which included hundreds of priests, then stood and applauded, said the sources, who asked not to be identified.

They went to Lincoln Center.