Too Stupid for Words category archive

You can’t make this stuff up.

A Clayton County teen accused of having sex with a 12-year-old girl was arrested after the girl’s mother did research on Facebook.

Oh, my:

Two people were arrested on charges that they burglarized the home of two University of Delaware students and put the stolen property up for sale on Craigslist.

Cops use computers these days.

When Chevrolet came out with the Camaro to compete with the Mustang, it claimed that “camaro” was a French or Spanish (depending on which source you use) word meaning “friend” or “chum.”

It wasn’t. It was made up by some Mad Men admen after a three martini lunch and best translates as “hunk o’ junk.” This started a trend of made-up car names. For grins and giggles, string them together to make soap opera characters. (“Alero Lexus, may I introduce Rav Acura?”)

Anyhoo, now in the history of unfortunate made-up car names comes the Prosche Panamera, which was apparently named after lunch.

One more time.

The internet is a public place.

A woman who claimed she was disabled has been stripped of her divorce settlement after her ex-husband spotted online pictures of her belly dancing.

Dorothy McGurk, who said she was unable to work because of injuries from a 1997 car accident, was being paid $850 (£520) a month in maintenance for life.

(snip)

A New York judge ruled her alimony should be cut to $400 a month.

This is just silly.

Via Balloon Juice.

The ability of persons who call themselves religious to be silly continually surprises me. I know it shouldn’t after all the years, but really . . . .

The Roanoke Times reports on Christians who don’t practice yoga, they practice “Praise Moves.” It just looks like yoga.

An excerpt; read the whole thing for the full impact of silly in the name of God:

“When Christians practice yoga, they must either deny the reality of what yoga represents or fail to see the contradictions between their Christian commitments and their embrace of yoga,” Mohler (Albert Mohler, president of the Louisville, Ky.,-based Southern Baptist Theological Seminary–ed) said.

Muslim clerics in Egypt and Malaysia have made similar comments. Jewish theologians also have explored the argument, giving rise to “Torah yoga” classes.

“It’s a question of how we define Hinduism, how we define yoga,” said Roanoke College religion professor Eric Rothgery, an expert on South Asian religions.

The query arises in academic and religious circles every few years. In 1989, for example, the Vatican issued a document warning Catholics that “proposals to harmonize Christian meditation with Eastern techniques need to have their contents and methods ever subjected to a thorough-going examination” to prevent adopting Hinduism and Budhism.

Truly, these folks could easily swallow a camel even as they strain at a gnat.

er, yeah.

Application for iPhone and iPad that claims to give users ‘freedom from homosexuality’ under fire from gay rights activists.

Apple is under fire from gay rights activists after it approved an iPhone and iPad app targeting “homosexual strugglers”.

More than 80,000 people have signed a petition against the so-called “gay cure” app, which Apple deemed to have “no objectionable content”.

Exodus International, the pro-Christian group behind the app, promotes the “ex-gay” movement, encouraging people to change their sexuality. The app gives users “freedom from homosexuality through the power of Jesus”, according to the group.

It’s bad enough to be in the middle of a family dispute when you are still alive, but this is ridiculous.

A breast cancer survivor’s Facebook page has been blocked after she published a photo of her reconstructed breasts following her operation.

(snip)

The social networking site blocked her page and removed the image because it said it broke its rules on nudity.

Ms Tullett said she had only intended to offer encouragement to fellow breast cancer sufferers.

“It was to show other women that after such an ordeal you can come out of it with your dignity and your womanhood again, and that it’s not all frightening,” she said.

I suspect that she should have known better. There’s nothing like pictures of real people to make other people get all stupid.

I’m beginning to think that life would be saner if we were willing to admit that real people look like real people from head to toe and dispense with the coyness.

Not likely to happen, though.

How “young” came to be paired with “stupid” came to be a cliche:

The (US DOT and Consumers Union–ed.) poll says 63 percent of people under 30 acknowledge driving while using a handheld phone and 30 percent say they’ve sent text messages while behind the wheel. For those over 30, the percentages were 41 percent on the phone and 9 percent texting.

Only about a third of the young people said they feel such behavior is very dangerous.

Arresting developments:

A violent domestic dispute was ignited when a Florida woman “un-friended” her beau on Facebook and changed her relationship status on the popular social networking site, according to police.

Language changes.

Not always for the better.

The U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops has ordered up a new translation of the Bible, one it says is more accurate, more accessible and more poetic.

Now “booty,” a word that sets off snickers in Sunday school, will be replaced by the “spoils” of war when the newest edition of the New American Bible, the English-language Catholic Bible, comes out on Ash Wednesday, March 9.

From El Reg:

A man who stole a laptop, then used it to post a gloating self-portrait of himself on the victim’s Facebook page is challenging for the title of the world’s thickest criminal.

If you tried to make this up, no one would believe you.

I think part of the problem is that some of these clowns have watched too many Dirty Harry movies and really do believe that solutions flow from the end of a gun.

Mother Jones had the twit’s twits in a twist:

The Indiana Attorney General’s office announced Wednesday afternoon its deputy attorney general is no longer employed by the agency, after reviewing political website Mother Jones’ published allegations that he advocated the use of force against protesters in Wisconsin.

According to the online article , Jeff Cox tweeted “Use Live Ammunition” in response to a Mother Jones tweet reporting riot police had been called into the state capital to remove protesters.

Via Balloon Juice.

You can’t make this stuff up.

It’s a pretty long list. Follow the link to find out why.

Here’s an example:

Via Thoreau.

Because he provided an excuse for this.

I would have thought that Sarah Palin and Little Ricky Santorum would have hit it off just fine. Peas in a pod and all that.

I would have been wrong.

Sarah Palin tells Sean Hannity that Christina Aquilera should be deported for missing some words in the national anthem at the Super Bowl. (Actually, “deported” is the wrong word. Since Aquilera is from New York, “banished” would be, I think, the more accurate term.)

Here is the crucial quote from Palin, offered without further comment:

“Here’s another case of an airhead diva going on TV, running her mouth off, sounding like a fool. She doesn’t understand something so basic about America, yet we’re supposed to tolerate her diva behavior? Americans can see through that, Sean.”

Via Eschaton.