Red Eye Gravy 4

I’m edumacatin’ Karen on red eye gravy, so I figured I would share the knowledge.

You put your grits on the stove to cook. Don’t use “instant grits.” They are so full of salt that they are evil. Probably invented by a Republican. Quick grits are okay, but cook them slow. The package says five minutes. Make it half an hour.

Fry up a couple of slices of real ham(tm) in the skillet (cast iron skillet, preferably–worth the cost, but I inherited mine; they hold the heat and spread it evenly).

After taking the ham off, put a little bit of water in the skillet, scrap any stickins off the bottom of the skillet, add a bit of pepper, and cook it up for a mite.

It’s called “red eye” gravy because it has a reddish tint from the ham.

Pour the grits over the ham. Pour the gravy over the whole thing.

If you have a low cholesterol count, add an egg fried in butter over medium at the bottom of the pile.

Eat and die happy.

Damn Yankees don’t know a blessed thing about cooking. As my cousin once said after a sojourn in Boston, “Them Yankees think peas and carrots grow on the same damn plant.”

Note that the greatest cookbook author in the history of mankind was from Mississippi.