Gunnuttery category archive

The polite always put the best foot forward.

Although there was no magazine in the rifle, he forgot to check that the chamber was empty. The man’s dog jumped on the bed, causing the man to accidentally pull the trigger, shooting himself in the foot.

Get a drop on politeness.

According to a witness, the victim dropped a handgun and it discharged. The victim was hit in the left collarbone area.

The brief report does not say, but I suspect the weapon in question was a large calibre rapid-fire stupid.

Suffer the children.

One must practice politeness so as to keep one’s hand in.

The incident occurred at about 3:30 p.m. at the Morr Indoor Range and Training Center along Willow Street in West Lampeter Township, according to township police.

“One person sustained a single self-inflicted gunshot wound to the left hand. Investigation revealed the gunshot was accidental,” police said.

If the other fellow had been holding his weapon, no doubt this would not have happened.

Police say the friend, who is also from French Lick, believed he heard something in the woods at the Shirley Creek campgrounds. He drew a gun and pointed it toward the trees.

The gun discharged when he attempted to holster it, with one shot striking Allbright in the back of the head.

Politeness: It’s in the bag.

Officers found a man on the ground with an injury to his left thigh. Officers used a tourniquet to control the bleeding and he was taken to the hospital. Police said the man, from out of state, stopped at the station and opened the back hatch of his vehicle and a duffel bag fell and hit the ground. A .45 caliber handgun in the bag discharged, hitting the man in the leg.

Self-politeness is the politest king.

Officials with Spartanburg County Sheriff’s Office said the man had been walking along Kirk Drive and had a gun in his pocket when it accidentally went off.

Deputies said a bullet skimmed the man’s leg.

I would hazard to say that this is a case of congealed carry.

Politeness is a family value.

The shooting occurred in a Northwest Indiana parking. The 3-year-old shot her mother, identified as Shaneque Thomas, 21, from the back seat of the vehicle while her father was inside a store shopping and trying on clothes, according to WMAQ-TV.

“She had no idea what she had done and she was very scared,” Detective Sgt. James Bogner said, WMAQ-TV reported.

The mother is recovering in the hospital.

Politeness is a breeze.

Both men were handling firearms in the breezeway when one of the men accidentally discharged a handgun, striking the other man, she said. The man who fired the weapon brought the injured man back inside the apartment and called 911.

Politeness takes the back seat to nothing.

Initial details police released said the woman was shot in the stomach while sitting in the front passenger seat of a vehicle, according to a Facebook post. The victim was shot by a backseat passenger, the post said.

(snip)

Defense attorney Dwight Hudson said Barber, the victim and others from Pine Bluff, North Carolina, were in Myrtle Beach to enjoy the weekend. They were in a car at the Waffle House when the shooting occurred.

“It was accidental as far as the gunshot and the wound and nothing is intentional about it,” Hudson said.

The woman is recovering and, in an unusual twist, the shooter is facing charges.

Be polite to your neighbors.

Police say a 25-year-old Lancaster County man is facing charges after he accidentally shot his neighbor.

Police say the man was about to clean the gun, when it fired, sending a bullet through the wall and striking the woman living next door in the head.

Police say the victim was shot in the head while laying next to her husband.

And another gun that mysteriously fired itself . . . .

Guns and stupid, guns and stupid,
They go together live love and Cupid.
Let me tell you, brother,
You can’t have one without the other.

Addendum:

We got talking about these “I was cleaning my gun” shootings during my quarterly visit to the barbershop. Those of us who know how handle firearms find them puzzling.

As I drove away, I realized that, in many cases, “cleaning my gun” is likely a euphemism for “having ammosexual relations with my gun.”

Politeness builds strong relationships.

The 21-year-old woman told responders that her boyfriend had accidentally shot her while he was unloading his gun. She was taken to the hospital with injuries described as life-threatening.

While she was being treated, police found her 24-year-old boyfriend dead from an apparently self-inflicted gunshot wound.

Cleanliness is next to politeness.

Cookeville (Tenn.–ed.) police said 28-year-old Jared Sidwell was cleaning a .40 caliber handgun Friday when it accidentally discharged.

The bullet passed through Sidwell’s left hand and shot 30-year-old Jeremy Sidwell in the right arm.

Anyone who is too stupid to ensure a gun is unloaded before starting to clean it is ipso facto too stupid to be allowed near a gun.

Q. E. D.

Be polite to your neighbors.

Parents now shaken with fear after a bullet came through their wall Thursday night grazing 11-month-old– Sam Henderson Jr. in the leg. Police say it happened at Cedar Glen apartments in South Bend around 8:20 pm.

ABC 57 News spoke with the regional manager of the complex who says it all happened when a neighbor had his gun out.

“This accident occurred on our property but as we understand it that you know this is gentleman cleaning his gun and it accidentally discharged,” said Brooke Davis, Regional Property Manager.

Stupid is a condition, not an excuse.

There is no jail term long enough for this amount of stupid.

Furrfu.

Be prepared for politeness while proceeding speedily.

The motorcycle was traveling west on New Haven Avenue in Melbourne about 5:30 p.m. Thursday, carrying a male driver and a female passenger. For unknown reasons, the driver lost control and hit the curb, a spokesperson from the Florida Highway Patrol said.

Both the driver and passenger were ejected in the crash. A firearm the driver was carrying in a holster on his hip discharged, striking the man in the leg as he tumbled from the bike, troopers said.

I guess safeties are things of the past.

Share the politeness.

Two women in their twenties and a young girl suffered gunshot wounds in their legs in West Valley City Wednesday afternoon, and a suspect is now in custody.

(snip)

“He was just passing through and started to shoot,” he said of the suspect. “He shot my wife and my daughter.”

Boys and their toys . . . .

According to court documents, Smith gave Brymer the airsoft gun after shooting him twice in the back, and Brymer tucked it in his front pocket next to his real handgun.

Brymer then mistook the real gun for the airsoft gun and shot Smith.

Smith was transported to the hospital, where he was pronounced dead.

Be polite to your neighbors.

Police say the 27-year-old woman was cleaning her gun about 1 a.m. Monday and pulled the trigger, firing a round through the floor and into the apartment below.

Authorities say the bullet struck a dresser near where a man was sitting. He wasn’t hurt.

In a somewhat unusual note, charges are pending.

Be polite in public discourse.

Authorities say a man found a handgun on the floor at a town hall forum hosted by U.S. Rep. Derek Kilmer at Olympic College.

The Kitsap Sun reports no one was injured during the Thursday event.

The story goes on the report that the fumble-fingers who dropped his portable penis “sheepishly” returned to retrieve it.