An ex-pat comes home to the United States to visit his folks and watches day-time television for the first time. A nugget:
I bite my tongue during the whole of the next ad for Kraft cheese. “Only one nation could create it,” says the voiceover, “and that is America.” To the outsider, there may be some comic mileage in unironic patriotic pride being expressed over the invention of processed cheese-food formed into bright yellow sheets and stacked like Post-it notes, but not to me. Let my children snort and roll their eyes. I’m unmoved.
When the label says, “cheese food,” it is not cheese and must be avoided.