Gunnuttery category archive

Politeness begins at home.

Police Chief Inspector Scott Small said it appeared that the 48-year-old father was the gunman who shot his wife and son before turning the weapon on himself inside the rowhouse on the 3800 block of I Street.

Yes, I know that it’s tiresome. Old news. Happens every day. And, according to the NRA, more guns in more hands and homes will make everyone safer and keep this from happening.

Also, have you noticed it’s almost always the husbands or boyfriends? There’s a pathology there that bears investigation.

Pre-emptive strike.

Lawyers for a Florida man this week cited President George W. Bush’s pre-emptive war in Iraq and the “Bush Doctrine” as a defense after their client killed two neighbors and attempted to kill a third on Labor Day.

Florida Today reported on Wednesday that attorney’s for William T. Woodward had filed a motion asking for charges against him to be dismissed under Florida’s Stand Your Ground law, which says that gun owners do not have a duty to retreat in the face of an “imminent” threat.

He circled around behind them in the bushes and offed them while they were having a barbecue because, says he, he was a-skeert of them.

Gun Nut Paradise approacheth apace.

And you thought magazines were a dying industry.

James City County Police are investigating after a loaded rifle magazine was found on the floor at Hornsby Middle School.

Just as a point of reference, the county seat of James City County is Williamsburg (aka, at least when I attended school there, “Colonial Disneyland”).

Politeness belongs at home.

An 8-year-old boy in Shippensburg, PA was shot in the head by his 6-year-old brother after the boys’ mother fell asleep with a loaded rifle and pistol lying out in the open.

You are never too old to be polite.

An 80-year-old former police officer was arrested after a SWAT standoff in Union County early Sunday, accused of shooting and killing his daughter and wounding a great-grandson.

Be polite to yourself.

Docteur claimed that the gang had robbed him of his money and then yelled, “North End, North End,” as they fled. The North End is a neighborhood in Bridgeport.

But Docteur finally admitted that the gun in his waistband had gone off and he had shot himself after he was not able to explain why there was only a hole where the bullet exited from his pants. He was also not able to tell police what happened to his handgun after the incident.

But keep it a secret.

Afterthought:

Packing heat is not as easy as gun nuts tell themselves it is.

What could possibly go wrong?

Oh, yeah.

More accidental projectile politeness.

A 18-month-old Atlanta boy has died after apparently being shot in the chest with a BB gun, police said.

Politeness must be learned young.

A Spalding County preschool student had a loaded gun in his backpack Tuesday, the school system said.

Another student mentioned the gun to a Jordan Hill Elementary School teacher, who found the gun Tuesday afternoon, according to Judy Parker, spokeswoman for Griffin-Spalding County schools. The teacher brought the backpack and gun to the principal, who called police and the child’s parents, Parker said.

Politeness must be symmetrical.

Two Los Angeles County sheriff’s deputies staying at separate sites on a Southern California campground were arrested after authorities said they pulled guns on each other and fired them into the air during a dispute over loud music.

Politeness in Slaughter, Louisiana.

An 8-year-old boy intentionally shot and killed his elderly caregiver on Thursday evening after playing a violent video game, authorities say.

Marie Smothers was pronounced dead at the scene with a gunshot wound to the head in a mobile home park in Slaughter, Louisiana, the East Feliciana Parish Sheriff’s Department said in a statement. Slaughter is about 20 miles north of Baton Rouge.

Gun nuts will no doubt blame the video game, which the story identifies as GTA IV.

The gun was an innocent bystander.

Accidental politeness?

A gun belonging to a York County Sheriff’s Office deputy accidentally discharged Monday night outside York High School, authorities say.

Never saw a gun go off by itself, for my part.

Be polite to Mommy.

A 29-year-old man killed his mother, set her house on fire and then shot randomly at passers-by in a Southern California neighborhood before officers, who had confronted him as he attempted to flee by tractor onto an equestrian trail, shot him dead, police said.

Be polite to the children.

Two young girls were hospitalized in critical condition Sunday, a day after they were wounded in a shooting at a northeastern Pennsylvania apartment complex, authorities said.

A 2-year-old girl is in critical condition and a 5-year-old girl in critical-stable condition after the shooting Saturday afternoon in Wilkes-Barre, Luzerne County District Attorney Stefanie Salavantis said.

I trust that the NRA finds the epidemic of politeness gratifying.

Treat past and present coworkers politely.

A longtime employee of a Florida trucking company drove around Saturday shooting former co-workers and his onetime boss, killing two and wounding two, authorities said. The gunman then killed himself.

Etiquette training.

More polite family time.

A Shaler man shot his entire immediate family this morning, killing his daughter and himself, Allegheny County police said.

James Edwards’ 19-year-old daughter, Laurin, also is dead and his 51-year-old wife and 21-year-old son are in critical condition at a hospital this morning, according to county police homicide Lt. Andrew Schurman and the Allegheny County medical examiner’s office.

If the wife and kids had been armed, no doubt the family would be sitting in a circle singing “Kumbaya” at this very minute.

Be polite in the school cafeteria.

A 5-year-old kindergartener has reportedly been detained at a school in Tennessee after a handgun discharged in the cafeteria.

Shawn Pachucki with Shelby County Schools told WMCT that police were called to Westside Elementary School following a gunshot that happened in the cafeteria at around 7:30 a.m. Pachucki said that the child brought the gun to school in a backpack and it accidentally discharged.

If the other kids had been packing, they could have been polite right back.

This day’s news brings a surfeit of politeness.

A 3-year-old was shot and killed Tuesday night, allegedly by a family member during an argument, Gwinnett County police said.

Set aside family time, politely.

Police said on Monday that a Christiansburg man shot his stepson in the house they shared, drove to Pulaski, shot another stepson and then killed himself.